This post is dedicated to Lini only .
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Listen , i don't want anything to happen actually , you just seek that
apology from my girlfriend , but i can tell you , i really can't give
it to you , it's because i can't find your reasons , logical enough
for her to apologise to you . but still , other then that , what
else do you seek ? you said to settle with me peacefully , but you ended
up quarreling with me , is that even what you and me wanted ?

Ever since the last few days before we broke up , we had conflicts here
and there , so many of them , and we broke up on 13rd April 2009 just because
we can't tolerate each other no longer , Just because of these conflicts we
have in the past , must we drag it on until the present situation we're both
in now ? I'm in no position to judge you or whatever now , you may think i'm
trying to run away , being a humji or whatever .

I'm just making my stand clear , I WANT PEACE . no war any or anything .
you think my words contradicts what i do in real life , but , i hope you are
just able to even see what i'm doing . And at the current situation now ,
We're bound to attack each other until one of us falls , but seriously ,
why shed so much blood ? Can't we just take it as nothing already ?
Afterall , it's the past . and if you're talking about the present things ,
still , it has already happened , you can't change that fact .

Many people kept telling me , to ignore you , to find you trouble , to talk to
you alone , but i know that , even if we happen to have a talk together alone ,
we'll end up quarreling because of our disputes and disagreements between both
sides , to find you trouble , nah , i'll pass on that , i'm too young for that
shit. to ignore you ? It's so HARD to even ignore you , You're in my same class.
Same school , and my friends are mostly YOUR friends , it's totally impossible
to avoid you , I'll tell you what i dislike about you now ,

I dislike your attitude towards things , your conduct , your insensitivity .
and lastly , your mindset , okay . i'm going to tell you why , Attitude wise,
i dislike about your attitude towards how you treat people . you treat them like
shit . kept disturbing them , scolding teacher . as for your conduct , i dislike
you shouting in class for no reason or rather , disturb people . As for your
insensitivity , it's the past already , but just 2 days ago on 21st July 09 .
you said you were talking to me nicely , but you're the first to shout at me .
other then that , you just fucking came to me and shouting at me when i was
sitting on the teacher's table , saying that we're ganging up to bully you ?
hey , it seemed like the total opposite . you're bullying me , not me . i have
no power to bully anyone , you have PEOPLE behind you , your FRIENDS , your
BELOVED gans . hey . i have mine too , but their not so... busybody huh .
hmmm . and lastly , mindset wise , i just dislike your mindset a lot . it
disgusts me , but still , it made me feel sympathetic on you . You're acting
as thought you're ALWAYS right , and i'm the one that's supposed to be blamed
totally . seriously , you think you're right , but seriously you're wrong ,
you yourself should know you've done wrong things too , and it's all not just
MY fault but it's OUR fault . so stop pushing the blame to me and everything .
because i'm sick of holding a burden or rather , a sin which i've not committed .

Those are my comments towards what i dislike you , what you want to say about me ,
i don't bother , it's just the disagreement between us that brought us this far .
You're not innocent , you should know that , neither am i . so , you and i should
have a talk , ALONE , name me when you want the talk , where you want it to be ,
It's best if it's In our classroom after school . but it depends on you bah .
whether to settle this through one on one talking , or rather , violence , it's
your decision .

The reason why i kept provoking you , it's because i want you to call those
"backup" so to speak , to come find me trouble . from my experience , i thought
that violence was the best and easiest way to settle something , but someone
made me realize my mistake , Thanks to that person , I'm waving my White Flag .
Are you going to do it too ? or rather , you're just going to continue this
war between us ?
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Disrepute : I've Given Up For The Better , What's Your Decision ?